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L/L Research Transcripts

ABOUT THE CONTENTS OF THIS TRANSCRIPT: This telepathic channeling has been taken from transcriptions of the weekly study and meditation meetings of the Rock Creek Research & Development Laboratories and L/L Research. It is offered in the hope that it may be useful to you. As the Confederation entities always make a point of saying, please use your discrimination and judgment in assessing this material. If something rings true to you, fine. If something does not resonate, please leave it behind, for neither we nor those of the Confederation would wish to be a stumbling block for any.

CAVEAT: This transcript is being published by L/L Research in a not yet final form. It has, however, been edited and any obvious errors have been corrected. When it is in a final form, this caveat will be removed.

Sunday Meditation

May 14, 1995

Group question: The question today has to do with our darker sides, the part that is unknown (inaudible) is mysterious, sometimes it’s perceived to be fearful or destructive or angry or in doubt or full of jealousy or rage or whatever. We are wondering whatever you can tell us about the darker side, how it functions, how we can shed light on it, if there is a way of becoming friends with and understanding what we see as the darker side. Is there another way of perceiving it, does it have a purpose that it plays in our spiritual evolution and how can we go about accepting ourselves and the darker side as a part of our overall growth?

(Carla channeling)

We are those of Q’uo. Greetings to each, blessings, and welcome and thanks for calling us to you. We greet you in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. To share in this time of meditation and thought is a most precious thing to us. And we are most appreciative of the call of that desire which each has to seek that which is the highest and the best in truth. That desire to refine and purify that which is the truth known within, that yearning, that hunger is a treasure more rich than we can express. It is riches to you, the seeker. It is riches to us and to all those who interact with you and blend their vibrations with yours. And it is a great treasure as well to offer the infinite One. We are happy to speak with you concerning the so-called dark side of personality. And we would ask, as always, that each recognize that these are our opinions. They do not carry the weight of authority; they are offered freely as flowers for the taking. Make your bouquet as you will and leave the rest behind.

We thank you for availing us the chance to learn by serving. This is our service at this time and you make it very easy for us, and for that we most heartily thank you. We are going to offer you a metaphor. This is not something to take literally but we feel that perhaps this metaphor may offer a structure that may be helpful. In this metaphor the Creator goes to sleep and in that sleep dreams. And in this world-view those dreams are peopled by all of those centers of light that we call beings or souls. It is not that the Creator sleeps in order for each of you to be awake. But in terms of the level of illusion which you now enjoy, this metaphor does a fair job of placing the experience of incarnational life in a context which makes it easier for each of you to see. That much of what is taken as real within a life is instead that which appears as on a stage and does its skit, its sketch, its scene for you, so that you are moved and shaped and given a variety of things to feel and to look at.

Now, in a dream this instrument feels that all characters are actually herself. And with that we would basically agree. In the dream which you call incarnational life, all the characters are indeed the same, they are the Creator. For it is the Creator’s dream you see, and each of you is a distorted fancy that is teaching the Creator about Itself. It is in this wise that each of you is indeed precisely the same. Each comes into incarnational life from a fullness of being that includes the loss of personality and the reabsorption into the Creator. When the veil lifts, each is aware although not able to penetrate that instantaneous present moment, that instant of Creator time, shall we say, when all the billions of your years, and all the thousands of your beings occur together. The likeness of entity to entity is a congruency. You have heard so often from Confederation sources that each is the Creator, that each is a universal being. That each contains all that there is. Yet, it is difficult to make these words resonate. It is difficult to make any set of words resonate, for they are but symbols of symbols. For each of you is like a symbol, a train, a character upon the stage. Much of that which is most truly you lies safely tucked within you, accessible to you only for the most part through creative effort, not necessarily complex or occult effort. For the self reveals itself to the self that has begun a process of purifying the emotions of facing of the self as it is. It is to this basic task that each of you came here to address.

Now, if each of you were obviously congruent with each other, there would be no way for information to pass. However, since the very essence of manifestation is duality and therefore illusion, this is not a problem. The illusion is intended to be a thick soup of confusion. And we encourage each to drink as heartily as he can, with good appetite. But also, we indeed do confirm that that which you have called the dark side is the hero, or perhaps we should say the anti-hero, of the play. For all the characters which you have within, it is the villain that places the soul in the situation into which faith may come and be the deliverer, and hope the handmaiden of that deliverance. You are steeped in duality. And all that is in manifestation is steeped in that duality. As this instrument was saying earlier, it is you that label the sweet and sunny side of personality as the good side or the light side, and the bad-tempered and ugly and mean and hateful the dark side or the negative side. This is an illusion. That which is truly negative is not those angers, those frustrations or those sorrows. But rather how the entity chooses consciously to express those bitter feelings, those strong passions that are indeed dark.

Now, all of those feeling states, if we may call them that, are equally beautiful to the Creator. They are pure expressions of a self that is universal, and that universal self contains every duality, in every level, in every way that anyone has ever dreamt. How full you are, how complete and whole. And so you are plunged by choice into a school full of illusion, in which there is no text book save the self. In which there is no teacher to give homework, only teaching assistants who give vague instructions and faulty [booklists]. You are adrift upon an ocean of thought and feeling and experience with only an intermittent star to guide the way.

Now, why would the Creator choose this illusion as a way to express the love that is the Creator? When one is within the illusion it does not seem remarkable that entities are born, that they gather experiences, develop and change and then die. It seems perfectly natural, if undesirable in the end, for who wishes to die? Yet, there is hidden treasure in this being born and this dying. It is the nature of manifestation that it can only be seen in illusion. Yet in this dim illusion rivers of beauty flow. To the Creator they shine like gold. Each sorrow in each heart is felt. Each joy is shared. Each bitterness and woe is riveting to the one infinite Creator. What the Creator sees, we cannot know. But we believe, that included in that eyeshot is enormous and unending compassion for the hopelessness of manifestation ever to become correct, full or perfect.

Yet, the senses, the emotions of those who have indeed purified their personalities express truth in ways that seems beautiful to the Creator. And therefore the Creator loves most greatly each pilgrim’s spirit, regardless of its circumstances, whether they be physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, for each entity is authentic in itself. Each entity expressing a unique distortion of unmanifest truth in the imperfection of manifestation. This paradox is one which can fascinate those which love riddles, for there is a deep riddle here: the riddle of manifestation itself. Yet love, that great original Thought, must use its free will, must create and so must love.

Now, within incarnation the seeker experiences itself as a good person under certain circumstances, which usually includes traits or actions or thoughts which are considered to be positive. One becomes happy at oneself if one feels that one’s nature has become sweeter. When the dark side reveals itself, when there is behavior coming from mind or lips or actions that do not seem kind, that seem bitter and unlovely, the seeker naturally tends to condemn the self. And yet, each is expressing in the light and in the dark the nature of the one infinite Creator, the universal being.

Now, you do not have to like your dark side. We do not encourage that. What we do encourage is a continuing desire to know the truth and a constant willingness to separate, when thinking of the self or another self, the beingness of that dark impulse from the choices made in the expression of that darker emotion. The Creator loves to the point of no return. Entities within incarnation find that sort of love impossible to sustain. Yet, you are your first and hardest target. Loving yourself is a central and entirely difficult goal to reach, for you know those thoughts that crowd your heart, those impulses which somehow you do not act upon.

And while the world may smile upon you, yet you frown and glower at yourself for being a universal creature. Ask yourself instead: “How shall I choose to express these emotions?” For each entity has them all, no matter how pervasive may be the effort to repress and deny one or another of the traits of human nature, shall we say. And so we encourage each to refine and refine again that which you do, that which you make manifest and real within the illusion which you now share. Inwardly, we encourage each to forgive and forget, taking only the learning and leaving behind that husk of self that was shed in the learning. And as the self becomes smaller, the inner power of the self shall grow, for with each name which you cease to call yourself, more love may move through that lighter being. Beyond all punishment and debt lies a forgiveness in which all debts are paid.

This entity moves within a mythical system which is called Christianity and central to this system of thought is the concept that sacrifice is a sign of great love. And we say to you, you have made that sacrifice: you will die. You are dust and as dust you are indeed unworthy, you are indeed imperfect. You are indeed the good and the bad and the light and the dark. And you will surely die. And between the birth and the death you shall plumb the depth of every sorrow of which you fear. And you will experience those few things left beyond the touch of fear as the mountain tops of life.

The dark side, when it comes up, when it shows its head to you, is saying how would you like to change, how would you like to try to learn this lesson. That dark side is meant to get the attention of the consciousness which lies within quite beyond all duality. For you do have enough of that infinite self at your disposal at all times in order to be able to process these feelings, these thoughts and these impulses which come to you, as you receive sensory input and process it and by your choices of priority distort that incoming stream of love in this way and in that, in a beautiful dance which is spontaneous and instinctive, so that when the seeker allows itself the time to learn the rhythms of the present dance, incarnational life begins to wake up within that illusion. And the life within pokes its little head out, like a tiny chick emerging from the shell and says, “Remember me, I am you and I have lived forever and I will forever live and I am everything, every emotion, every state of mind and all of these things are love.”

So we encourage each in forgiveness of self and at the same time in asking great things of the self, in asking that the self turn to the Creator and say, “Here am I, show me my destiny and I will say yes.” For you planned this with the Creator before you came and it is a matter of trust and faith to take each thing as it comes and attempt to find within yourself that response which expresses love. My friends, we have a very simple message. It is always the same. Each of you is love. Each of you has a core vibration of absolute pure love. That which is consciousness is love. That which is love expresses itself in consciousness. Each of you also has heavy overlays of distortion, chosen by each over a long period. Each is rich in distortion. And these distortions are also beautiful to the Creator, each one perfect in itself. And as you mix and mingle with yourself and your various roles and with each other in the delicious and bewildering array of humankind, the love that you can share with those you meet, beginning with yourself, is the fruit and the blossom that is truth.

So, love any way that you can and praise the love that you see, and know that in loving one is never foolish, one is never wrong, one is never too naïve, for all things are beautiful and lovely in the core which is the truth. And each time that you claim that truth, you claim, yes, you claim an illusion. Yet, the illusion that you claim is indescribably more accurate in its representation of the actual truth than that expression which does not include love.

Love is often seen by your people to be a pallid emotion that contrasts to earthly love, which is not romantic, and not possessive, and so forth. Yet, we say to you that love is a beautiful and terrible thing. Out of love the Creator manifested this illusion. And out of love this illusion must end. Out of love one of your young is conceived, and in great pain oftentimes is given the chance to breath and die. But within that theater of incarnational life lies the opportunity in every breath to know the truth and to be free to turn to the one infinite Creator and to become one with that love and that light which is divine.

Love is not a nice or a pretty thing. Love is an anguished dream, a yearning, an expression that shall surely fade and fail as the rose dies, as each being has its season only to vanish. Yet in that temporal, evanescent environment comes an opportunity to believe that which is not seen and to follow the leadings of the heart, which are never logical and often resist interpretation or analysis. What wondrous love lies within each. How infinite is the richness of each and every connection that can be made between those who seek to serve. Let yourself be imperfect and focus upon the loving and the seeking of how to love better. This is our opinion, and we share it with you. For all else will die, but love is infinite, for it is all that there is. When you are engaged in seeking, you are engaged in asking how to love. It is not an easy thing. But you can help each other. You can reflect to each other honestly. You can simply be with another as that entity faces its dark side. And where that entity might not find forgiveness, you can, for you see clearly when the self is another. And the other may see clearly when you cannot see.

(Side one of tape ends.)

(Carla channeling)

So, know the treasure that you have within you when you love, and more know the treasure that you have when you do not love. For it is then that your dark side has emerged to teach you once again. Honor and praise all of yourself and know that it is your choice of how to play the instrument of self which matters. For each has the same instrument. And each has all of the abilities necessary to tune that instrument. With our hearts full of love for each, and our desire to encourage you to be easy on yourselves and forgiving of yourselves very keen, we leave this instrument in thanks.

We know that we have raised more questions then we have answered. Yet, that is inevitable for the very character of spiritual seeking is two impossible things at once, that somehow are possible. Paradoxes abound. Riddles are the very stuff of spirituality, for each is the enigma that love is. And we do praise that divine mystery that lies in the consciousness that we all share in the selfhood that we together make up.

We would at this time transfer this contact to the instrument known as Jim. And we leave this instrument in love and light. We are those of Q’uo.

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and greet each again in love and in light. At this time it is our privilege to offer ourselves in the attempt to speak to any further queries which those present may have for us. Is there another query at this time?

Questioner: I would like to ask you a question about the polarity of the entity known as Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh. Would it be possible for you to comment on the polarity of this entity and possibly those around him, those associated with him?

I am Q’uo, and we are aware of your query, my sister. So we fear we must disappoint, for we are not desirous of sharing information which may affect the decision-making of any who values our words, and we find that there is the desire upon the part of one that feels kinship with us to know that which we feel is best left for the unknown at the present time.

There are many entities who revere the words and the life of those spiritual leaders who have for them provided a pathway to truth and to knowledge and to the opening of the heart in true compassion. That each entity has those attributes which are enlightening, and also contains those attributes which are upon the topic of this evening’s address concerning the darker side of the illumined self, is also without doubt a truth. We must remind each that all seeking is holy, and each entity is a teacher to another as well as being a student to yet others. If any entity can find the place to place the faith and can be inspirited and inspired by another to move forward in the evolutionary journey then who can say whether there is negativity or a positivity within the self which inspired such a step, no matter what other elements in that entity be considered. Thus, we would choose to leave this particular query unanswered, for we find there is more of service in so doing than in speaking in a specific sense.

Is there any other query, my sister?

Questioner: Not at this moment. I leave it to others. Thank you.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you my sister. Is there another query at this time?

Questioner: I would like to know, given that it seems as polarity increases, harmony increases, does it work the same in both directions, that is, if one polarizes more negatively, does that increase harmony as it does when one polarizes more positively?

I am Q’uo, and I am aware of your query, my brother. And to the best of our knowledge, which is limited we admit, as the entity who has chosen the service-to-self path becomes more efficient in this service, there is more of that which you would call a disharmony produced. For the, what we could call, the natural order of things, that is, unity of all, is broken or fragmented into manyness in order that a small portion of that manyness may govern and manipulate a larger portion of that manyness, then the natural harmony which binds all things together is seemingly shattered upon one level of existence, that is, the illusion of the creation where the many must without question obey the few who feel it is their duty to set the universe in order. Thus, we find that the quality which you would call harmony is one of the first casualties upon this path.

Is there a further query, my brother?

Questioner: Ah, on negatively polarized planets do they have more problems than we do with environmental destruction?

I am Q’uo, and I am aware of your query, my brother. It is the general run of this particular path of service that the quality of disharmony and difficulty within the illusion is experienced upon all levels of the existence, though there is more expression of the disharmonious elements within the interpersonal relationships, for it is here that those who seek power over others find the avenue to its attainment.

Is there a further query, my brother?

Questioner: No, thank you.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you again, my brother. Is there another query?

Questioner: If I may ask, OK. It’s not on the topic we are talking of tonight. My question is actually about fourth density. A notion came up recently about the disappearance of nationhood befalling—of the walls between nations. I wonder if that’s a necessary stage towards forming a fourth-density social memory complex of this planet. Would it be possible for you to comment?

I am Q’uo, and I am aware of your query, and we believe that we may respond by suggesting that to many entities who are experiencing the pull towards a cooperative or collective consciousness that the dissolving of such boundaries is indeed of significance along this line. There are many, however, who in their own personal journeys of seeking see such occurrences as a continuing strain or strand of confusion and disorder, which is a reflection of their own personal lack of unity in choosing a path of service. Thus, those who see with clearer eyes, those who look beyond their own personal boundaries and seek that which binds all beings into one, are those who are more able to see events about them as being significant in the achieving of this unity.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: Could we be applying what you answered to other realms of this physical (inaudible) reality in terms of this social/economic situation of people?

I am Q’uo, and we believe that we grasp your query, my sister. And we would suggest that this analogy may be applied in any realm or segment of third-density existence, for all of this illusion is as a mirror to the one who seeks within.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: No, unless (inaudible) do and so can’t think of any (inaudible).

Questioner: OK, I was wondering about the state of consciousness seen in literature known as nirvana, enlightenment, oneness and so forth. From what I understand in all discourses is that we as third density are here to polarize either towards service to self or service to others and that is still on the journey of duality, and yet there are people on this planet of third density, people who are beyond duality in the experience of enlightenment, the oneness. Would it be possible for you to comment on the seeming apparent conflict that I see in these two different notions, either for us as third density to polarize, say to a service to others or to surpass that, to just go beyond being part of that duality and just be one. Could you comment on that?

I am Q’uo, and we feel that we may speak most appropriately by suggesting that there is the glimpse, the taste, shall we say, that is available to any seeker of the truth that will give the inspiration of the fully experienced presence of the one infinite Creator at those times when it is most important for the mind/body/spirit complex to understand to the core of its being that the journey of seeking and polarization, as you have called it, that it is upon, is a journey which is undertaken in the full protection of the one Creator; that all in truth is one, that there is in truth no right or wrong, positive or negative, that can match the complete unity of the one Creator. Thus, the seeker is from time to time upon its journey given these moments of inspiration and unity to bolster its being and remind it that it is a participant in a great and joyous dance that has as many faces as there are units of consciousness within the one creation.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: One more. Do entities that polarize towards service to self also experience such moments of enlightenment, of oneness?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. These contacts with intelligent infinity do indeed occur for those upon the negatively or service-to-self oriented path. However, the experience is one which moves past the green-ray energy center from yellow to blue, then to indigo, in order that the negatively oriented entity, who sees compassion and love for all as folly, may experience a contact with the one Creator that is in accord with its chosen path, that which sees the power, the control, and the setting in order of those about it as its duty and as that which is most desired.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: Not at this moment, thank you.

I am Q’uo, we thank you once again, my sister. Is there another query at this time?

Questioner: Is the duality of positive and negative another illusion?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my brother. And we would suggest that all is illusion, except the unity of the one Creator. All creation, all things, all other seeming entities are an illusion or distortion or portion of the one Creator which must be distorted until there is the complete realization and reunification with the one Creator.

Is there a further query, my brother?

Questioner: No, thank you.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you once again. Is there another query?

Carla: I have one. I have been assuming for years and years that the people that come to me were, let’s put it this way, many people come to me and feel that they recognize me or they know me and with some people, I just … I am able to key into them very easily and it has that feeling of destiny about. Is it true that we come in what somebody has called “soul herds”?

I am Q’uo, and we are aware of your query, my sister, and can affirm that there are indeed families, groupings, clans, tribes or whatever description is considered appropriate to describe the groupings of entities that move as souls together upon the journey, having spent a great deal of time previous to the present incarnation determining the future experiences, as you would call them in your experience of time, so that the efforts that are planted in one incarnation may produce the fruits in a future effort. Thus, one builds upon another and together those who are of like mind are far more certain to discover that which they seek.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Carla: No, I just, I felt that that was the truth and that I could trust destiny to bring me the people that I want to care for. That’s a very comforting thought, thank you.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query?

Questioner: My turn, I have a question, Q’uo, about (inaudible). For some reason why did you say, that it is like a joyous dance to be in the circle of seeking … I hope that (inaudible) see as much light as I see in love to being together like this. Thanks for commenting.

I am Q’uo, and we also are much and truly pleased by the invitation which is offered to us at each enjoining of this group. We dance with you and listen in awe at the music of the spheres, that is always with us and this group.

Is there a final query at this time?

Questioner: Can I have the final question? I’d like to ask you if you could comment when … maybe I should ask this as a personal question. You know, when I feel something in the third chakra, you know, like a blockage or a shortness of breath of sorts, what is the best way to look at it and how to know the best way to learn from this catalyst and what?

I am Q’uo, and we are aware of your query, my sister. We can always recommend the meditative state for the place in which to accomplish this work. There is great benefit in the regular setting aside of time so that one may review the daily round of activities and explore the centers or chakras, so that there is then the possibility of discovering where openings or blockages may exist. And when these are discovered in any form such as you have mentioned, that there be a surge of those recent experiences where efforts in any particular center were offered, what the results were, how the emotions were affected and so forth, so that you look at your own experience as your guide to what centers have received the inspiration or the blockage. Looking then to see if there are deeper or connected issues that may explain or shine a greater light upon the feeling that is associated with the center, thus one can begin to set up certain avenues of exploration within the self that can be called upon to continue to offer insight, connections and a larger point of view to that which is usually experienced in the daily round of activities.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: No, thank you very much, I will meditate on that.

I am Q’uo and we again thank you and commend the regularized meditation to each entity for it is in these times of communing with the deeper self and the greater self that the vicissitudes of the daily life may be explored and experienced in their essence, that the detail of the day falls away reviewing that which is of the most import.

At this time we would express once again our great gratitude to each present for inviting us to join you in your circle of seeking. We realize that the hour is late and that there is much tiredness in need to move the muscles at this time. We shall take our leave of this instrument and this group, leaving each, as always, in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are those of Q’uo. Adonai, my friends, Adonai.

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