ACCEPTING THE UNACCEPTABLE

Group question: How do you deal with a totally unacceptable person or situation when you have attempted to do everything that you know how to do? How do you balance doing what is possible with simply accepting the situation as it is?

(Q’uo, September 16, 1990)

I am Q’uo, and I greet you in the love and light of the One Infinite Creator. To Her service we are dedicated. It is our great privilege and honor to be asked to join your own seeking as you sit in meditation this evening. We ask, as always, that all remember that we are not infallible, and discrimination is requested.

We speak upon the subject of accepting of the unacceptable, forgiving the unforgivable. Each of you is well aware of the way those things in the distance appear very small, whereas those things just before one loom large. That sense of distance, or proportion, is an excellent tool for achieving a state of mind in which the heart, the true and deep mind, may learn the lessons presented by the unacceptable and unforgivable entity, relationship, or condition.

We would speak now about the free will that is beyond understanding and is the first distortion of intelligent infinity. Without it matter could not have been illusorily created. Without it there would not be dimension, or the illusion of time. Without free will there would be only Love, unknown and unknowing; that is, the essence, the Logos of Love, which is the Creator. As this Love is unconditional, whole and pure, just so is free will absolutely unpredictable. Thus as each sub-sub-Logos, each of you, chooses to enter upon the path of accelerating your spiritual growth, you are dealing with a sensibility of mind which is all too firmly connected and concerned with the bodily, mental, and emotional needs which have been acquired within the illusion that you now enjoy. Many, many choices that you make are not based upon spiritual principles, for your experience of life is that it moves too quickly sometimes for you to have a sense of proportion about what is occurring. The reasons for this are bound up in the principle of free will. No two entities are alike, and no one entity shall remain as it is throughout an incarnation.

The incarnate state is one of constant flux, learning, loss, and opportunity. The loss is artificial in that it consists of the empty places made by those persons once loved, now discarnate; by truths, once loved, but now seemingly necessarily discarded; by ideals which the world you live in has provided enough catalyst to undermine in your own experience. And so because free will, like the wind, blows hither and yon in all entities, it is inevitable that those who plan to learn as much as possible in one lifetime will arrange to have serious and fundamental challenges to their understanding of the principle of unconditional love. In order for you to be able to find the self that can do this, it is necessary to find the love which is woven with free will in order to make a physical illusion and work with it in such a way that you are, at least temporarily, able to untangle the strands of love and free will. When you see and know and trust the absoluteness of love, the mind may rest much easier, the heart may become aware of its truer intelligence and the responsibilities of meeting the challenges of difficult relationships and impossible situations begin to change and transform in shape.

We of the Confederation of Planets in the Service of the Infinite One have often spoken of the need to discipline the personality. By this we do not intend to mean the controlling, the suppression, or the repression of any feeling that you truly feel, any thought which you truly think, any action which you do feeling that it is appropriate. These are each entity’s choices which one is unable to make while remaining concerned primarily with that which is mundane and of no spiritual consequence as far as you subjectively can see. In fact, all things are fraught with spiritual teaching. All of the creation sings its song of love to you. But it is the disciplined personality who has gained the perspective on the value of mentation and the far greater value of the infinite wisdom of the heart. Thus when challenging situations occur, one who has the firm foundation of a life in faith will not fear the unforgivable, will not fear the unacceptable, will not need, in fact, to react unless, as an entity of the heart, there are those things which you feel may aid in a spiritual way that one which is unacceptable.

Thus your only responsibility is to love. You do not have a free will responsibility at this point, for free will does not forgive. It is love that forgives. Thus, as you step aside, disciplining your own freedom in order to serve and learn, you experience a love you could never experience within your humanity, a love which is in infinite supply. And to that difficult or impossible situation or entity you simply send love, and use your mental capacities to reason with yourself as to the cause of unacceptability, gazing at the situation, not with an eye to solving it, but with an eye to understanding the unacceptable entity or condition, and when that is done, to forgive it, to forgive yourself, and be clear and ready to gaze without any fear whatsoever at the situation or entity, for there is love and service in this opportunity.

This is a simple and seemingly rather glib summary. It does not take into account the enormous difficulty of doing these things within your illusion. And so we would speak of an aspect of your illusion that is absolutely necessary to the illusion but is that which baffles almost all entities. You know free will if you know the wind. The winds move here; the winds move there. The winds bring rain and are a boon to your earth. The winds bring storm and destroy life upon your earth. The winds are zephyr soft, touching the cheeks of lovers on a summer night. The wind carries raging snow that blinds those who challenge it. In short, the wind is an influence not to be influenced. In the metaphysical sense, the wind that blows for you and moves you about on a level of which you are unaware is free will. It cannot be predicted. It cannot be wholly understood, and yet it is the same experience for all entities. If the wind is blowing within your illusion, no matter how many entities experience the same wind, they all will acknowledge that it has passed them, for they have felt its effect. The world of metaphysical things is more subtle. The effects of free will are just as subtle but set up situations within your energy web where you are open and vulnerable to the challenge of a distortion of love brought about by another’s free will.

So it is not you that finds another unacceptable, nor is it another which is unacceptable. You have the same nature, but you do not have the free will you had yesterday, and tomorrow it will shift again. So it is with the other entity. It is that free will portion of yourself, not your deepest self, that generates judgment such as unacceptable or unforgivable. Within the heart which is freed by a discipline of personality, and given a path of service by the freely made choice of the entity, love abides, and your instinct is to send love to that entity which is in enough agony to act inappropriately and to act as painful catalyst for you. In this painful catalyst you may see in the other’s free will choices, free will choices of the self, made with distorted understanding. Consequently, all statements of judgment of others are made not with the heart, but with the mind and undisciplined free will, for the heart will not judge. The heart will accept and allow the self to be the self, and other selves to be their selves. The heart of one who is positively oriented does not control an unacceptable situation to cause it to be acceptable. It controls the often destructively illusory free will portion of itself that it may move into a deeper self, into the wisdom of the heart, and from that standpoint all conditions of entities are seen as part of a blueprint of evolution which it is up to you to learn to grasp at least in essence.

Now the wind is often used also as a simile for that which in the spiritual distortions called Christianity is named the Holy spirit. As all things are holy, if it is acceptable to each we shall use the term, Comforter. That which is carried upon the wind of spirit is alive. The spirit of the consciousness of Christ is alive and speaks to the world today saying, “Peace, peace, forgive, console, pardon, and start with yourself.” Now this Comforter does not give comfort any more than the teacher, Jesus the Christ, gave comfort. Healing this entity gave, and freely, strength to the weak, sight to the inwardly blind as well as outwardly blind, strength of limb to the lame. But did this entity ask to be understood? In your experience, has any entity whom you have considered great or wise asked that you understand him or her? It is unlikely, for it is unimportant to those who live in the heart. They do not need to be understood, and consequently they do not attempt to be understood. Spirit does not attempt to be understood. The comfort is in its understanding, and your comfort also is in your own understanding.

The process of opening one door while closing another is again difficult because of perception problems in this illusion. Free will in its raw and untamed state is almost precisely the opposite of true freedom of will, which is the will of one who is disciplined and freely chooses. Thus, not being blown about by the wind of the self, you may then internalize the wind and become aware of the spirit. And as you become aware of this spirit you shall find yourself moved in mind, in emotion, and sometimes even geographically, in order to do those things which you have not after all forgotten you came to do. The wisdom of the heart is full of this blueprint. The conscious mind, governed by logic and free will, can never accomplish this. To move from head to heart, while retaining the concept of mind, is not anatomically sensible, but it is the best vocabulary we have to describe the deep love and security which you may find when you have accepted the wind within you, for you are spirit. It is the body which is weighty and full of chemical reactions that are part of this illusion.

As you offer your free will to the blueprint you have planned for yourself, you become free and enabled in your actions. In this awareness there is nothing unacceptable, nothing unforgivable, but only that which may be seen as this or that distortion of love brought about by untamed free will. Free will holds up the mirror to free will. If you gaze at another and find unacceptability, realize that that is a mirror. Now you may do your inner work, for you have been aided by that entity which has been disparaged and judged. What is there within you that must be forgiven? For if you judge others, you have not forgiven yourself. If you are completely self-forgiven you have absolutely no need to judge, for you have no fear and nothing to defend. You can see through the free will, having seen through your own. You can tame the wind for yourself, and you can be of service to others by mirroring to them as honestly as possible that these are actions that you choose to make, and you choose them because they are of spiritual aid in the service of the Creator to this beloved self, that is you, in other-self form.

You picture yourselves, most naturally, as entities with a head and a backbone, two arms, two legs, the requisite number of organs and digits. You are a kind of entity you cannot understand as you gaze upon your physical vehicle. The difference in your consciousness between seeing yourself as this physical vehicle, and seeing yourself as spirit, is the difference between being blown by the wind and being the good and kindly wind that blows love always that is open and fearless, vulnerable, and unafraid. Once you have found your own essence you shall never fear again. It is the catalyst caused by facing the unacceptable, and by finding ways to offer love and to glean and harvest love in the situation as well, that is the wisdom gained through this shift in identity from chemical plant which moves you about to the essential self which is humble, non-judgmental, completely unafraid, completely free, and completely able and willing to listen, to understand and to love the tormented hearts of those caught in this illusion which you now enjoy, caught painfully, caught unbearably.

If someone is unacceptable to you, that entity is deafened by the wind of his own free will, and has an extraordinarily distorted expression of love to offer. You cannot heal or help the other self. You can only make your own choices. The entity that is unacceptable does not impinge upon you. It is merely catalyst if you still have work of your own to do in forgiving yourself for being all things, including many, many things which you consider unacceptable. You are carving out for yourself the right to ride the wind of spirit. Judgment, which is behind unacceptability, and fear, which is behind judgment, anchor your feet to the ground. You cannot fly; you cannot soar; you can only be injured and injure as you seek through judgment and the putting on of mental and spiritual protection to attempt to make yourself more comfortable in the prison of your bones and sinew.

When you find the love within in its pure state you are not confined; you are not finite. You have found your own eternity. In this eternity the wind of the present moment offers all lessons, whether it is necessary for the illusion, which causes judgment to seem appropriate, to be very hard to penetrate so that you will make your choices to judge or to appreciate, to ask for service or to be an agent of infinite service. If you are able to let your love free to ride the wind of spirit, you are always following the blueprint you have laid out for your own growth. This is the density wherein you decide the nature of all entities about you as well as yourself, and with this understanding choose how you shall serve that mystery that created you and all that there is. Do you wish your feet anchored to the earth by judgment and the need to get points across? Or do you choose to soar in the wind of spirit, judging neither yourself nor others, but asking, and asking, and seeking and hoping to be love, to be a channel for truth, to share in the infinite, that your light may be a catalyst that frees others from their own bondage?

We thank each again for this opportunity to blend our vibrations with yours and to speak to the heart of each entity in its desire to know more of that which you call the truth. We shall take our leave of this group at this time, leaving each, as always, in the love and in the light of the One Infinite Creator. Adonai, my friends. Adonai.

NOTES TO OUR READERS

[There were no Notes in Light/Lines Number 48.]