The question this evening has to do with how we make our way through the illusion, working with the catalyst that we have planned for ourselves. We are assuming that we put the catalyst in place before the incarnation in the form of various experiences that make an impression upon us so that we have a basic personality with which to operate, and as we go through the incarnation this basic personality that is formed early in our lives then has a series of lessons that come in the form of various kinds of catalyst, difficulties, problems, confusions, challenges. How do we use the basic personality that we have put in place, and how do we face the catalyst when it is, as many people feel more and more, overwhelming, and seems to have no end, there seems to be little rest? Is this a function of growing older, or a part of the cycle that we’re going through now since it is so close to the end?

(Carla channeling)

Greetings to all of you in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are known to you as Q’uo. We are humbly grateful to have been called to this place of desire for knowledge and truth, and we shall do our very best to share what truth we personally feel to be so with you. As always, we wish to remind each of you that we are not infallible, but rather those who have teachers just as you do, those who walk the seemingly restive trail, without time and space, but standing always upon holy ground. We, like you, are finite in our own manifestation at this time. We are all dust that lives in the presence of the infinite One.

Your question this evening has to do with how one may find a point of balance within your illusion where one feels relatively safe, where one cannot be overwhelmed by circumstance or difficulties. So as you picture yourself walking upon this infinite trail, the first tool, or resource, that you have in order to work with the illusion which so often attempts to bring you from your center, is to remember that, as this instrument would say, wherever you go, there you are. You cannot cope with life, for life is an illusion. The only thing within this particular illusion, or any illusion that we know of in the kingdoms of the Father, is each imperishable spirit to whom we speak. You must make it through yourself. It is not circumstances which overwhelm one, but rather the self’s choice of reaction to circumstance.

Now, let us look at one’s handling of one’s self. Do you handle yourself as if you were a precious Chinese vase? May we say that no, you do not, in that how much more precious are you than such a manmade artifact? How little you value yourselves, how much difficulty and grief do you cause yourselves by asking to be perfect in every way, according to your own personal definitions of this behavior, in an illusion which was created specifically not to be ideal. The Creator gave you consciousness. This same Creator did not give you happiness, nor should you expect that this quality will come to one who is wise, or compassionate, as a reward for living well. As in any schoolroom, you are here to learn, and there is never a comfortably given test in the history of education, according to most students. But being within the illusion, you focus upon the material which you are receiving, rather that upon the consciousness that receives it, that is, yourself.

The experiences are transitory. The choices that you make in reacting to these circumstances slowly build up a non-transitory resource. If you have had courage once in choosing what was subjectively perceived as the ethically correct thing to do in a situation, you have made a difference in yourself, you have chosen, and with each choice your polarity, your positivity, your service to others, becomes intensified, until there begins to be within each who continuously seeks persistently, the fire, the passion, to do and to be that which is love. There is no activity that can give you this attitude, and the test that you will take at the end of this life experience has everything to do with attitude.

You may find within the illusion that circumstances are overwhelmingly difficult. Often one is stretched to one’s limits or beyond them, and one may consider that one has misbehaved and done wrongly, and regrets and rues each seeming [inaudible] and wishes with all its heart that it might return to that moment and do it again, only this time with love. That is why time is so vastly important within your illusion, the stream runs one way. You have a shot at creating a conscious light-filled moment, fresh and new and joyful, every instant of your life, and once that instant is gone it is gone. This is true, not of a few people, or of most people, but of all persons in whatever path of service has been their destiny, their burden, and their honor.

So when you look at situations and hear the difficulties coming into your ears and feel them growing in your heart, know that you are experiencing yourself, and that that which has happened to cause these feelings is within you. You cannot escape yourself. You cannot escape every other thing in the illusion including the illusion, but in each escape there is the wasted opportunity for learning the lessons of love. Thus we hold up to you a picture of yourself, as beloved, created as beloved children, rocked and comforted and held by the mother nature of the infinite Creator, and strong in heart to wish to do that which is of service.

When as an adult, so-called, you are hurt, mentally, or physically, or emotionally, or especially if you suffer that most painful of all sufferings, the spiritual suffering, you know that you do not have anyone to run to. You are no longer a toddler that can run to the all-embracing mother and hide your head upon her lap and cry until you are released from sadness. You must be that nurturing mother self to yourself. You must treat yourselves well. This is not service to self, for if you cannot treat yourself well, out of a pure and unconditional love for yourself, with all of your imperfections and errors, then how can you love and serve those about you?

Thus, the first resource revolves around your own self-concept. You need to know yourself more and more deeply. As always, the daily meditation is a great aid in this search for the universal and unique self that you really, deeply are.

Secondly, we would talk about the resource of [inaudible]. When one is not aiding, caring for, and loving the selves about it, family, friends, strangers and humankind, one may do all manner of things and yet not [inaudible] oneself at all engaged in the joyful possibility of living. There is tremendous spiritual help in having an attitude of servanthood to all those about you. Let your thoughts run towards what you might do to be of service to all those who cross your path. How twisted and convoluted are so many entities’ feelings towards those whom they meet. How very often in judging and biased opinion the content of one’s thoughts instead of the realization of each person as precisely as important as you, and every other being within your density that you now enjoy. We do not mean that you should doff all other priorities and simply follow other people’s instructions. That is not the kind of servanthood that we mean. As a matter of fact, we may suggest that often you will find yourself in a position, as you attempt to be of service, in which you are being unpleasing to the entity whom you wish to serve. Now, as you can see that another is addicted to some strain of thought or action that is unhelpful and self-destructive, and you are then asked to aid in this addiction, the one who wishes to be of true service is the one who will refuse, but never without compassion, never without clear communication, and never without forgiveness.

The service-to-others path seems simple. One pictures oneself as being a kind of celestial waitress, bussing the tables of humanity, easing other peoples’ passage through the difficult times, splitting the great Red Sea so that your friends may pass dry shod. We do not see this as service to others, for each entity needs to be given room to learn for itself. Therefore, sometimes the greatest service is to allow a being that depends upon you to make it safe to live, to make mistakes, to make errors, for those whom you wish to serve will not learn if you do the learning for them. Rather, in relation to others you create an atmosphere in which learning is safe.

If your heart is full, and energized, and open to the love about you, you will feel those times when love bubbles forth from within you as a spring into a fountain, and you will see yourselves used as beautiful, as inspirational witnesses to the light that you are within. Many of your people are afraid of this light, and will indeed shutter it from your sight, because in order to become aware of oneself as light one must square with oneself one’s true nature, and although each entity is unique, each contains all emotions, potentials and possibilities of which one may think. Thus, you do not get to know yourself by behaving, or doing well. You get to know yourself by observing yourself being precisely what you want to be, and what you feel to be. And then, when the day is done, asking yourself where the stress points are, where [inaudible] or the delightfulness of the day has occurred. So you begin to find out your own nature. And as you learn your own nature it becomes transparent.

One does not need to act out one’s own nature with anger and trauma, for one is quite aware, having done the work, of what is actualizing, or causing the entity, yourself, to be thus and so. So you not only nurture yourself, in, of yourself, and by yourself, but you nurture yourself in relation to others, by offering, through your simple attitude, a sort of atmosphere of helpfulness, a relaxed and welcoming aura which invites entities to feel safety and peace when they are around you. In that atmosphere, then perhaps you may be of further service by the talking, the speaking together, they enjoyment of laughing, friendship and love. For to be of service to others you must needs have some sort of idea as to who you are, and you need to have given up and surrendered that childhood need to protect oneself by behaving. [Inaudible] not behavior. Your actions are spontaneous moment by moment. [Inaudible] invulnerable, [inaudible] as has been said this evening, or as [inaudible], are girdled, so that we may include women, to be of service in whatever way you can. No service should ever be put down by the self, or [inaudible] anything that is done for the love of the one infinite Creator is equal to anything else that is done in that love.

The last resource that we shall cover, because we realize that this instrument is telling us we are speaking too long, [is] what you call among your peoples the sense of humor. People who are extremely serious about accelerating the path of spiritual evolution have a tendency to sound like the Volga boatmen, putting their poles in the deep rivers of the Volga, and pushing slowly, and with difficulty, to make the [inaudible] barge move. This is not the true nature of spiritual evolution. The laughter quotient, shall we say, of your days should be gradually moving upward. Many things should be transparent to you who have been upon the trail for awhile, and therefore deeply humorous, in the humor that goes beyond the smile and warms the heart. For this life that you experience is the joke without the punch line. You [inaudible] yourself. As you gain perspective and see yourself as soap opera characters, cartoon characters, creatures that would be ridiculous and still be [inaudible], secure and undaunted, so will you lose the many, many layers of fear which cause you to armor against the delightfulness of life.

We are aware that this is a world in which young children get run over in the roadway, in which young men die fighting for something that they do not understand. We are aware that there are many, many injustices, that life is not fair. This is an illusion designed to cause you to act, to cause you to think, to assist you in making choices. Shall you be the cynic, the one who is usually correct for the moment? Or shall you be that idealist, who always suffers for the ideal in the present, but who, in a millennium or so, will find that that ideal still holds truth, and is something to which it has been worthwhile to be loyal. Idealists, in your extremely relativistic society, are most often seen as fools. Can you accept that, or do you need to behave in such a way that people will never see you as fools, but as one who knows the score, one who is in the know, one who is a player in the game of [inaudible], and [inaudible], and [inaudible]? If you choose to retain your ideals in the face of life as you experience it, you are both accelerating your path to consciousness, and becoming more vulnerable to appearing strange to those about you. If you care about your reputation more than you care about your ideals, you will most truly be more successful during this short [inaudible] of a lifetime. But what shall you have done for yourself as a being of light?

We ask that sometime in the next few days you do two things. Firstly, sit, quietly, and watch your grass grow. You will be delighted by the life that you see teeming all around you, the glory of the sky, the beauty of the foliage, the music of the laughter of children, and the human dark comedy, with anguish over misbehaving children and friends. How funny and beautiful is your illusion, if you can but slow down and look at it. The other thing we would ask you to do is to laugh. Not a giggle, not a chuckle, we ask you to lose yourself, to find that one thing that for you takes you out of yourself. All of you are in need of healing and laughter [inaudible]. You patch together melancholy, and [inaudible] lists of what to do, and naturopathic remedies. Simple laughter.

Thus, we would leave you with those two thoughts. Love and nurture and honor yourselves. Love and nurture and honor others, who are all yourselves. And be merry in your love. Give to your life the light touch. Let the world come to you, for you are not [inaudible], you are [inaudible] upon yourself. We know that you love the Creator, [inaudible] whatever way you choose to think of this higher power. You love the mystery. You love the dream. Please know that it loves you back…

[Side one of tape ends.]

…that it loved you before you loved it, and that it and you are love. You may now [take] two steps backwards, and take the long sigh of relief. And we urge you always, when you are feeling harassed, to take those two steps backwards, and take a long, deep breath, just a moment to praise the Creator, to thank the Creator for all the blessings of life. It need only take a moment that you would [inaudible] turn [inaudible] situation [inaudible] eternity.

We would speak to the one known as S, in explaining who we are, for there is a portion of our principle that is Latwii, and this portion of ourself wishes to extend our assurance to this being of light that it is never absent, though it never speaks, it is always there as a battery, as a carrier wave, to strengthen and smooth and comfort the path of this entity. We are a principle made up of two social memory complexes, that of Ra and that of Latwii. Ra is unwilling to risk this instrument by further speaking in the sleeping state. Those of Latwii are also students of those of Ra, and are most happy indeed to be able to blend our vibrations to offer to this instrument all such thoughts as she may be prepared [inaudible] to offer.

We thank and bless each through this instrument, and thank this instrument for offering itself to our service, now and in each day. We will close the meeting through the one known as Jim. I am Q’uo.

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and greet each again in love and light through this instrument. We are pleased at this time to offer ourself in the attempt to speak to any queries which may have arisen in the minds of those present. Is there any query at this time?

Yes, Q’uo, I’d like to ask one.

[Rest of tape is inaudible.]