The question today has to do with the concepts of anger and sorrow since they seem to be so common to our experience. We’re wondering if there’s any good way of opening ourselves and allowing the processes of anger and sorrow to pass through, to be broken by the experience and to be healed so that afterwards, we are stronger or wiser or more loving or will somehow benefit from having had this experience. Could you talk to us about anger and sorrow?
Greetings in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are those known to you as Q’uo. And we offer this circle our thanks and blessing for allowing us to blend our vibrations with your own. And to be called to share our opinions with you on the subject of dealing with trouble and woe.
As always, we respectfully ask that each who hears these words employ discrimination, accepting only those thoughts which ring true to you and allowing all others to pass by, for we would not wish to create a stumbling block by sharing our mere opinion. We, like you, make mistakes and share with you as fellow seekers after truth, not as those who are in authority.
In order to speak of this subject we must back up and begin from the general standpoint, looking at the whole being and its purpose as seeker in experiencing incarnation in this third density of yours at this particular time. As it is the latter portion of the cycles before the phenomenon this instrument calls the coming of the New Age, all—we correct this instrument—many of those who are seeking at this time are those who have by seniority of vibration been given the opportunity of incarnating at a time when both the positive polarity and the negative polarity are attempting to increase the intensity of their distortions toward service to self, for positive entities and service—we correct this instrument—service to others for the positive entities and service to self for the negatively polarizing entities.
In this environment both the positive and the negative of polarization shall naturally seem more extreme and so it is that within your culture at this time there are many whose seeking of the truth is outstanding and whose efforts to learn the lessons of love are substantial and persistent. At the same time, those involved in seeking negative polarization are attempting in a marked manner to create negatively-polarizing situations, which may express the utmost in negative orientation. Consequently, there are legions of those who think nothing of stealing, or killing, some for a holy reason, supposedly, but many for no reason except the attraction of power.
It is against this backdrop in your history that the seeking for truth now goes on upon your sphere. The rules, shall we say, have not changed but the experience is more intense for all upon your sphere. We, therefore, have the ability to speak to this circle and say that each within this circle has won through to the present incarnation by virtue of much labors of love, shall we say, done prior to the present incarnational experience. Therefore, each feels fairly strongly that the seeking of the spirit, the seeking of the heart, the seeking for a greater understanding of love, is properly the center of the incarnation. Each is attempting to live according to the positive path and attempting to polarize positively. Therefore, we do not have to coax any to do the work necessary to continue working on that polarization. Each has some grasp of why he or she is here—to learn the lessons love has to teach.
The questions that remain are more along the lines of wondering why it must be so confusing to seek the truth, why the Creator so often seems hidden within a situation. To sum up many thoughts—why does it have to be so hard, for the heart remembers perfect ease and harmony. Contradicting all experiences within the incarnation there lies the heartfelt feeling that the normal way to live is not available in this incarnation. The memory stubbornly persists that harmonization between people is second nature, and we say to you that, indeed, except for third density experience, harmonization betwixt any two entities is not just possible, but to some extent in positive polarity, inevitable.
The question then becomes, “Why did I leave that pleasant estate to come into this intensely difficult environment equipped only with the limited and confused biases which all seem to fall wide of the truth, so-called. What is the great goal seen that made me come here?”
Perhaps you already have the answer. You came here because you wished a challenge and because you wished to serve. The challenge for each is unique to each and was set by you before this incarnational experience. Each entity wished to take particular courses over again in the school of life, as this instrument would call it. Each wished to drive home one way of learning to love.
Now, each also wished to be of service and that is another topic. We speak now of that entity who came here to your orb, not because it was pleasant, but because it was difficult, confused, and very dark in many cases. And because each wished to immerse the self within this difficult and baffling set of conditions so that the lesson would be enduring, deep and thorough. Each wanted to work very hard. Now, before an incarnation the self remembers that incarnations are more difficult than they seem beforehand, but just as the student remembers the joy of learning and forgets some of the agony of change involved in learning and adopting amended ideas, so each has an element of surprise and even betrayal. Each argues to some extent with the judgment of that higher self that chose these lessons.
In addition to the services which each came to offer, there are, indeed, tools which one may use to work with one’s own grief, anger, disappointment and rage. The first tool is the one around which we have been throwing up a structure of words to rather enclose. That reason is a stubborn faith that you came here to work, so now, let us work. The first tool, we are saying, to use when you are working with negative emotions, is simply remembering who you are and why you came here, why you are here now. For there is, in each case, good reason for you to be precisely where you are. As the one known as Ra has said, there may be surprises, however there are no mistakes.
The knowledge that you, yourself, judged these lessons possible to be learned can be a cheerful knowledge to recall. Not only would the Creator not offer you more than you could bear, also neither would you, yourself, before this experience place yourself in that kind of situation. Therefore, if you are to be overwhelmed by these negative experiences, we encourage the allowing of this being overwhelmed. If there are the tears, cry them—cry them all and respect each drop, respect and love those mute expressions of grief, anger, sorrow and rage. Accept the excesses of feeling that shake and seemingly hurt you. Know that these feelings are justified, that these feelings are protected, that there is time for these feelings to express. And work with the self to encourage the eventual completion of expression of the feelings involved.
We encourage each to nurture the self through these difficult times, allowing and even encouraging those tears, the raised voice, the angry motions, all the silly, childish, acting-out that is involved in being overcome by emotion. For within this opaque, deep illusion, there is no other way to complete and then balance negative emotions. The only way through the feelings of negative emotion is directly into the midst of them.
So, attempt, if you would be good to yourself, not to turn and run from painful feelings, but rather to choose a time to nurture the self and within that nurturing time alone look at, accept, and offer respect to the bruises, the hurt feelings, the pain that is going on. For these emotions, when accepted and respected, can scour and scrub much material that is ready to be taken off of one’s shoulders, emotionally speaking, and rinse those ripened, matured evidences of pain away. In many ways, sorrow and its tears, anger and its loud voices, are healing to the troubled soul. The anger, the sorrow, these are not things to fear; they are experiences to go through in the way that is most true and real for each.
The second tool, which may be used when these feelings are seen, is the turning to the one infinite Creator, for these feelings are taking place in an infinite creation. Within this infinite creation there is one thing that is true. That thing is love. Love expressing as truth, as beauty, as goodness, love expressing as mystery. It is not necessary, you see, to remain in the sea of confusion, paddling about in the frail barque of flesh that is your own upon this infinite voyage. Once the reality within the illusion is addressed, once the sorrow and anger have been owned, accepted, respected and the entity within all that feeling nurtured, then is there wisdom in turning to praise and thanksgiving of the one infinite Creator, to turning once again to love.
And this is not done in a way which denies all that seems imperfect, but merely setting those painful emotions into the most true version of a universe which you can find, and that is, that infinity of space and time against which the troubles of a day begin to seem somewhat small. For, within the self lies all that there is. The portion of the self dealing with the surface emotions within a particular incarnation is most small. It does not belie the agony felt to place it against the backdrop of infinity and see that it does not take up the entire creation, but that there is a deeper and surrounding environment which goes beyond space and time and of which each is more a native than this present Earth. Each is a citizen of infinite and eternal creation, moving into praise and thanksgiving, readjust[ing] the point of view, biasing it towards truth and polarizing it towards service.
When the object of anger or sorrow is another, there is a type of meditation or experience this instrument would call prayer, in which prayers are offered for the entity which has been catalyst for this sorrow or anger. Praying for that entity which has harmed you also reorients the deeper mind and biases the deeper mind more towards truth.
The last of the tools we shall speak of this day is the tool of the one Self. When the mind can settle upon the unity of each self with all other selves, then it can more readily be seen that each entity outside of the self is simply a mirror reflecting your self back to you. Those things which anger you are angering you about yourself within some portion of your inner, larger, self. The sorrow felt for others is sorrow felt for the self. It only seems to involve others. Taken upon the surface, this statement seems patently false. However, in the deeper sense, and certainly in the sense of working spiritually with emotions, it is true, as far as we know, that all that you see is your Self. You are in common with all that there is.
The one known as J, whom we greet for the first time today, has spoken concerning these issues and we wish to encourage this instrument to go right on with that thinking, for we feel there is much merit therein. Allow these common experiences their rhythm and their time.
We would at this time transfer this contact to the one known as Jim, for we find that this instrument is somewhat fatigued. We will leave this instrument at this time in thanks, love and light. We are those of Q’uo.
I am Q’uo, and greet each again in love and in light through this instrument. At this time, it is our privilege to ask if there might be any further queries to which we may speak. Is there a query at this time?
I’d like to make a quick one. I abruptly lost the contact and when it came back it just said to go to you. I wonder what happened, or is that beyond the…
I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. We felt that we had utilized your instrument to the fullest extent, given your physical weariness, and had spoken the greater portion of our message which was, as usual, of some length. Thus, we felt it was well to make our usual break in the working by transferring our contact to this instrument so that your instrument might rest and those other selves in the circle listening might have the opportunity to query with specificity any point not understood or ask concerning any other area. Thus it was convenient all around, shall we say, for the transfer to take place at this time.
Is there another query, my sister?
No, that’s very well, I just do not usually have such an abrupt leaving. Thank you very much.
I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query?
When dealing with others who express their anger for me, or directed to me, other than prayer for that person, is there any—the question has to do with other people’s anger and other people’s sorrow, that seems so overwhelming to them, that to share what I understand, hurts, rather than helps, and, other than prayer, is there anything that can be done with those people, for those people?
Also, I’d like to ask about the idea of beings being of the Earth, and how to best utilize that, how to get to a growth, a growing through. Is that enough?
I am Q’uo, and we are aware of your query, my sister, and shall endeavor to speak to this topic.
The process of growth is one in which all entities participate. Whether one experiences the anger of another or of the self, the experience is of anger and the spontaneous response instead of, shall we say, the studied response is most helpful to all concerned as this process continues, for the spontaneous response is that which is nearest to matching the ability of an entity to give or receive [the] love in a particular moment.
Whether there is difficulty or ease in this process will depend upon the entity’s previous experience at learning to give and receive the love of the moment and of the heart. Thus, as you mirror each other’s emotions you mirror that which is within yourself as well, for not only are you all seekers of the same truth, you are seekers who experience much the same catalyst of pain and of sorrow in making the great journey which you call seeking the truth.
Thus, to do that which is within your heart is that which is most helpful at the moment and who can say what that will be before the moment comes. Trust always that inner feeling, that heartfelt movement, that moves through you as you experience the catalyst of your incarnation. Share these emotions with those about you who have shared their experiences with you. Thus, you are seekers of a like mind who seek together and have, as a group, far more opportunity of progressing than would each of you individually.
Is there are further query, my sister?
No, thank you, Q’uo. Thank you.
I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query?
I have a question. I want to ask if you could explain about the process of setting boundaries, how to do it in our [inaudible], different relationships, friendship involved, etc.
I am Q’uo, and we believe that we grasp your query, my sister. If we are incorrect, please requery.
We do not necessarily feel that there is the practice of boundary setting that is what we could recommend, shall we say. For we are aware that there is a portion of your mental health profession that feels that boundaries are of necessity for each individual and in some cases there may be the situation where the boundary is…
[Side one of tape ends.]
I am Q’uo, and am again with this instrument. We shall continue.
It is well to remember that all is, indeed, one being with many perspectives in experience. Thus, if an individual feels that there is the need for a boundary or a definition in a relationship which does not presently exist, then it is the honor and duty of that individual to speak with clarity to those with which it is in relationship and to speak those thoughts that are heart-felt concerning the definition and nature of this relationship.
This is the great work of this illusion in which you move at this time—to come into relationships with those about you, to communicate concerning the shared experience, and to be willing to work again and again with all of the catalyst that appears, with the inevitable misunderstandings and miscommunications that are the grist, shall we say, for the mill of your life experience.
Thus, it is the decision of the seeker, indeed of each seeker at all times, to find those balances of relationship that are most meaningful and to work in a clear and compassionate sense in order to share with others in relationship this perspective that will hopefully enhance the overall experience of relationship.
Is there a further query, my sister?
No, thank you.
I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query at this time?
I don’t precisely get angry, but there are times when—I mean I do get angry—but what I’m talking about, what I’m asking about is—it’s a time when I click over into a program having to do with my father, and to some extent, my mother, having to do with having to defend myself and explain myself, and nothing ever quite being acceptable. No one in my life now does this to me, but sometimes, if I feel as if it’s happening to me, I’ll go right into that old program and it’s not real, it’s not responding to the situation that’s actually—now, I don’t know how to break into that programming. Is that a question unto itself?
I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. Again, we would suggest more of the working with the spontaneous eruption of emotions than would we suggest the breaking into this programming, as you have called it, in order to stop its movement. Though many programs, responses, emotions and inclinations are difficult, painful and confusing, it is well to allow oneself to be in the midst of these emotions for their duration in order to experience the fullness of their effect, for all experience has the potential to change or to transform the being which experiences. It can become confusing if an entity looks at its behavior as that which always needs correcting. It is far more helpful to look at the behavior as that which shall be experienced at the moment of its inception, allowed to run its course, then looked upon and analyzed at a later time with the objective eye that may be able to glean from the experience that which is available for the learning.
Is there a further query, my sister?
Yes, let me work with it just a little bit. There’s a part of me, when that happens, that there’s a witness to it—just watches it. Is there some skill involved in leaning more into the witness, while allowing the program to run? Is this witnessing a helpful part of the self, at that time?
I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. The faculty of the witness is a portion of the process of experience which is later to mature, shall we say, for each entity is the witness of all previous selves and behaviors and can look with an objective eye more at this time than at the time of the experiences occurring.
Thus, as you are able to become a witness to your current experience, you are able to observe it more for the movement of energy and the patterns created, than be moved by it and become unaware of the direction of movement. It is helpful to be able to see these energies in motion, yet it is not that which one strives to achieve. It is that which one becomes, as a natural part of the process of learning to accept one’s destiny, shall we say, or to work with one’s catalyst in a clear and open-hearted fashion.
Thus, we again recommend the allowing of the experience to unfold as it will, including the experience of the witness.
Is there a further query, my sister?
No, Q’uo. Thank you very much. I’m [inaudible].
I am Q’uo, and again, we thank you, my sister. Is there another query, at this time?
I have a query. I’ve heard that I’m too analytical, and how does that fit in with the emotions? I had another question that I can’t think of, but maybe it will come back. But the analyzing, the intellectual, perhaps, interpretation of—attempt to process and understand the emotion is what I think is meant by “too analytical,” and how does that balance out?
I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. The intellectual ability to review or to analyze previous experience is that faculty which is much like the surgeon’s scalpel, in that it seeks those portions of experience that are valuable and need to be preserved and removes from them those portions of the experience which are of little or no value, so that there is, from each experience, a certain harvest that allows one to improve, shall we say, the balance of mind, body and spirit. This balance is that which each works towards and makes an attempt to equal or live up to, shall we say, the personal ideals or standards of excellence—that which one believes in.
The analytical ability allows one to compare the experience of the day with the ideals of the life. Thus, it is best to utilize the analytical mind at a time that is set aside for such, rather than attempting to apply the intellect at each moment of experience, when one is in the midst of it, shall we say. Thus, the analytical ability balances the emotional experience by gleaning from it that which is helpful for the overall balance of the being.
Is there another query, my sister?
No, thank you.
I am Q’uo, and again we thank you, my sister. Is there a final query at this time?
Thank you for answering my unspoken query, Q’uo.
I am Q’uo, and we are grateful, my brother, to be able to serve in any way that we can.
At this time we shall again thank this group for inviting our presence. We are most filled with joy at each opportunity to blend our vibrations with your own. We assure each that we walk with you on this journey and that no entity walks alone, for each has those friends, teachers and guides that walk with it as do those brothers and sisters within your own illusion walk with each in spirit.
We are known to you as those of Q’uo and we shall take our leave of this group at this time, leaving each, as always, in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. Adonai, my friends. Adonai.