[overview] The question today has to do with our darker side because each of us have thoughts of injuring another who has wronged us, and that makes us uncomfortable. We would like to know how to deal with this darker side because it is part of us that needs some kind of recognition. Could you talk to us about how we could relate to that darker, shadow side of our selves?
We are those of Q’uo. Greetings in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are most happy to be called to this circle of seeking, and we thank and bless each whose search for truth has led you to this place at this time. As always, we ask that it be known that we are not infallible. We make mistakes. We have opinions. We are those who walk with you. We are not those over you, but pilgrims such as yourself. And we share a royal road together, for there is a kingdom whose head is Love itself, and on that highway to Love we are comrades. We thank you for the company and for your great desire to progress and become more of who you truly are. This is the great journey to the heart of the self.
At this session you wish to have some thoughts from us concerning the darker emotions, more especially anger. We are aware at even this remove from your density at the power and attraction of that magnetic emotion that you call anger. If we needed to put a more accurate term to it we would call it a kind of fear. However, upon the surface that emotion is anger. It is... as we say, we do remember that it is very uncomfortable. It is extremely difficult to ignore, for regardless of whence the anger has come, its base is in the survival chakra, the red-ray energy center. One who is enraged is fighting for survival. That is, the body and the second-density brain of the creature that carries your consciousness about is honestly, genuinely concerned for its survival.
The second density is not a density in which reason has a great part. And those instinctual angers that come from a feeling of being invaded or threatened have as the natural response deeply held emotional consequences to the individual moving through incarnation. Anger and the darker side in general are not things which we would encourage you simply to ignore or to brush aside, for you cannot tell your physical and emotional second-density body not to be angry because it is not spiritual. This does not make sense. It is only in that consciousness which is abstracted from the incarnation that one has either the ability or the right to work deeply with this dark side.
So, the first thing that we would say about the darker emotions is that they deserve a place, that they deserve respect. They deserve attention. If such inner pain is not addressed and honored it can shrivel the most robust nature.
Now, let us look at what we said earlier, that anger is a kind of fear. In your language you use words that are approximate and we cannot find words in your language that satisfy us in speaking through this instrument to distinguish between various aspects of anger and fear. However, generally we would say that love, that original Thought that created all that there is, is of a nature that is purely expansive, moving outward and radiating in all directions from every point. It is the great celebration that lasts to infinity. When that love pours through the vehicle—physical, emotional and mental of the entity within incarnation—that love moves into the field of the body at the base or red-ray chakra, that survival chakra, and if it is blocked there by contraction, by fear, not much energy can come through to move into higher energy centers. The same is true for each energy center.
Therefore, the first work upon the self having to do with anger is to see its place and to forgive the self for having this nature, this nature that contracts against threats, that defends against the enemy. That which is not love is illusion, yet that which is love is also illusion within your density. So when you as a seeker find yourself radiating within in hostility, aggression, anger, rage or resentment your first duty is to yourself and it is to validate and support that dark side, for that dark side is very concerned with your health and welfare and it needs to be reassured, comforted and held as gently and lovingly as the baby at the breast.
The response of the seeker to its own dark side needs to be, in the beginning, an acceptance of what seems to be a less attractive portion of the self. The objects of anger and resentment, spiritually speaking, only seem to be other selves. Actually, you may look at each other self with whom you interact as a mirror which reflects to you those things you like about yourself and those things you do not wish were a part of yourself, and the angrier that you are at that other entity, the more a part of yourself you are recognizing and responding to.
It is as though the anger were a vampire type of spirit threatening to take you over, to suck from you your life and strength. And yet how does one cause vampiric activity to cease? There is only one way, and that way is to accept into the heart that vampiric energy, to cradle it and to know it as the self, and to say in compassion, “This, too, is me.” Yes, you shall have fear. Yes, you are worthwhile. Your illusion was created so that you could not but help but respond blindly to incoming catalyst. It was not intended that an incarnation in third density be without conflict and suffering. Indeed, that portion of you which is your higher self rejoices when you feel that catalyst of rage, resentment or anger, for now you are doing the work that you came to do.
The source of a great deal of anger is the dynamic betwixt two entities, yourself and another, and so although all fear has a red-ray blockage, many feelings of anger also are generating orange-ray blockage, as that is the ray in which you an working with yourself and one other self. That is the relationship chakra, the belly chakra, the chakra where many entities will try to control from. The person that has a lower belly tension is often reacting to another being who is attempting to control or is reacting because the self is attempting to control another. In either case, not only the red-ray but also the orange energy center is experiencing some blockage and when the anger has to do with anger at society or at the culture or at groups, this anger is also generating yellow-ray blockage.
What this means is that you as an energy user are put suddenly on short, short rations so that although the energy coming to you is infinite, the energy that is making it up to the heart chakra where it can open the heart is much diminished, so once you have accepted yourself for having this dark side you have the basis for a long program of work doing what we might call coming out of a hidden place. We gave this instrument the vision of a closet. It is as though your fear, your blockage, as you experience the catalyst that creates anger, contracts you into a crowded, small space and you feel that you would explode if you could to make that place larger, yet the skillful way to work with this anger once it has been identified, accepted and forgiven in the self is to see that there is a real concern which can only be addressed by love itself.
In this work of addressing fear it is well, as this instrument would say, to maintain the baby step and not to attempt to walk out of the closet into brightest noon saying, “Well, I am out of that closet and I’ll never go back.” Because no matter what your station, circumstances or vibratory nature you will again be in that space as long as the veil is drawn between you, your conscious mind and that great store of information which lies below the consciousness mind.
It takes faith to gaze at a situation in which you have gotten angry again and again and still be able to say, “I will open the door just a little more. I will not try to become a person without anger, but I will try to become a little more light, a little more lifted from fear, a little freer than I was a year ago, a month ago, a week ago, or an hour ago.” Do not try for the dramatic breakthrough. These things do occur, but they cannot be forced. Try, instead, to pour your compassion into that closed place and allow the compassion itself gently to move the being back into the light. Baby step by baby step. See the darker emotions as a darker color and the peace of compassion of service as the light, and see your being moving gently and slowly two steps forward, one step back, throughout the lifetime, and feel good about that, for work in consciousness is a maintenance program. It is not a college one graduates from.
All the created universe exists because of opposites. It exists because there is light and dark. The dark side within each of you is as it must be in order that you may manifest at this time, at this place. You cannot get over your humanity. You cannot become an entity without polarity. You must be that which your nature is. You are top to bottom and side to side entities of three hundred and sixty degrees, the full circle of personality from lightest and brightest to the deepest and darkest. The skill lies in seeing your emotions as information bearing energies, offering to you the fruits of your own past and the seeds of your transformation into an ever emptier, ever lighter, ever hollower self. The earthy part of the self, that soil in which the dark nature hides, is a heavy thing, and it is that soil in which truth and beauty and those mysteries which call you forward grow out of this very soil.
So, we encourage each to gaze unafraid at those dark emotions within, to love and accept them, and gently and persistently and with humor to work with them, putting them in perspective, seeing them for the vampires that they are and allowing compassion to flow as you enfold your dark side in your heart. The goal here for each is to open the heart.
We would at this time transfer the contact to the one known as Jim. We thank this instrument and would leave it in love and in light. We are those of Q’uo.
I am Q’uo, and greet each again through this instrument in love and light. At this time it is our privilege to open ourselves to any further queries which may be upon the minds of those gathered. Is there another query at this time to which we may speak?
[new speaker] P
How can we help another person who is enraged with anger?
I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. It is a situation in which one’s intuitive capacities are often called into play, for it is a most fluid situation to experience the anger of another, especially if one is the focus of such anger. We can recommend that one attempt to accept the other entity for having such anger and through this acceptance to seek communication that might clarify not only the present situation in which the anger is being expressed but which might also move more deeply into the origin of the anger within the other entity. This kind of communication is that which is most easily accomplished with those who are close friends and those who are willing to explore with you a portion of the self that is not pleasant to expose. If the entity does not wish to speak of the anger at the moment it is being expressed then it is well to wait until there is a time in which the entity is willing to speak upon this matter, the emotions having been drained away concerning the situation. We recommend, first and foremost, however, that acceptance is the foundation upon which all further communication and interaction may be undertaken.
Is there a further query, my sister?
[new speaker] Carla
I would like to follow up on that. I’ve watched a couple of relationships which were like this. One person refused to communicate and was simply abusive. This can’t help but hurt. Is there any way to defend oneself against being personally hurt by such abuse? Even words really do hurt.
I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. The most effective means by which we have found that one may deal with such a situation is to work internally upon the self for the building of the confidence that one has not truly generated such feeling but that the entity experiencing the anger has the responsibility of generating that anger, for as those known to this group as Ra have mentioned, there is truly no emotionally charged situation. There are only emotionally charged responses, and each entity will respond to each situation in the way that the entity has biased itself in consciousness previously to this incarnation.
Thus, the one experiencing the anger and expressing the anger has the responsibility of dealing with that anger and its causes. The one feeling the anger has the responsibility of dealing with the emotions that come up as a result of experiencing the anger. Thus, if it can be kept in mind and in perspective as to who is responsible for what, it is most helpful, for if the entity that is around another expressing anger takes that anger into the self and feels one way or another, the feelings are this entity’s with which to deal.
Is there another query, my sister?
[new speaker] Carla
I just wish I knew some technique which wouldn’t shut out the other person but would make the person getting the abuse safe.
I am Q’uo, and we would ask if there is a specific query to which we may speak?
[new speaker] Carla
I’m just concerned for P, who is a strong person and who is reduced to rubble when exposed to the anger of her spouse.
I am Q’uo, and am aware of your concern and your query, my sister. This is the stuff of the third density illusion, the interacting of entities whose motivations, intentions and talents are varied, whose paths cross and re-cross bringing into play all of the pre-incarnative catalyst that was intended to be looked at in each incarnation. There is confusion, there is anger, there is doubt. There are many emotions that come into play as each relates to another and to others. There is in one sense no safety, for one is vulnerable at all times when one opens the heart in love to another. And in another sense there is only safety, and no damage can be done, for each is an eternal entity and all seeming damage is only that which exists in the moment to be worked upon as catalyst for future growth and the strengthening of the concept of the self.
Is there another query, my sister?
[new speaker] Carla
No, thank you.