Jim: The question this evening, Q’uo, has to do with loving ourselves. We are wondering how we can love ourselves more, or if we don’t love ourselves, how we can begin to love ourselves. We think there might be some facets to this process, one of the most important being able to forgive ourselves for our self-perceived difficulties and failings. And if there are any other facets to this, can you talk to us about them?

(Carla acts as senior channel for this session.)

We are those known to you as the principle of Q’uo. Greetings, my friends, in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator, in whose service we come to you this evening. It is such a privilege to be called to your group this evening and we are delighted to share our humble thoughts with you on the subject of loving and forgiving the self. It is a wonderful topic.

Before we begin, however, as always, we ask a favor of each of you that listens to or reads this channeling and that is, please, to take responsibility for the resonance that you may or may not hear in our words. If you hear it, if these thoughts are good for you, then by all means, use them. If they do not ring true for you, then let them go without a second thought and continue listening for the resonance that marks for you that path that is yours. You can trust yourself, trust your powers of discrimination and discernment. We thank you for aiding us by doing us this favor for it will relieve our minds to know that we will not be infringing upon your free will or disturbing the rhythm of your walk seeking the truth of your life and all creation. We thank you.

My friends, it is not at all unusual when you awaken to find yourself more and more able to forgive others. Your heart overflows with compassion for them. Why is it, then, that the awakened soul lacks compassion for the self? There is a certain amount of role-playing that is necessary in the process of meeting those whom you meet, interacting with them and so forth. When you have awakened and you are dwelling in the now, in the present moment, and you gaze upon another who is seemingly attempting to cause you hurt or suffering, you see past the surface to the underlying truth of their soul-stream. You see past the mask that they are offering you at the present moment and you know them for that soul that they are. And you know that if any harm is meant you, it is only meant in the ignorance of not being aware.

We do not say that this is an egoist mask that you wear, for it is non-judgmental and full of compassion. But there is a certain amount of distance between you and the object of your compassion. It is a comfortable distance and you will find, as you mature in spirit, that you will, one day, find that there is no distance between you and another, so that you are walking in their shoes, feeling their feelings from the inside out, and you will find that your compassion only grows greater.

Yet that same function of the mask can serve to blind you to the truth of your own being. You can, if you are not comfortable with the self, see every thought. You may never speak it to another. But your impulse is to [judge it] as an error, an error that you, the awakened one, know better than to make. And so you do not say that thought. You do not express that error. Yet you have become aware of your secret thought. And some of the impulses that dwell within your heart do not meet with your approval as an awakened one.

How can you put down your mask? How can you become that consciousness that dwells within—closer than your breathing, more familiar than your own face; that place of no-ness—no pretensions, no name, no word but only love.

We are those of Q’uo, and at this time we would transfer this contact to the one known as L. We are those of Q’uo.

(L channeling)

We are those of the Q’uo, and we speak with this instrument now. We greet you again, each of you, in love and light. It is with great amusement that we fully express within this instrument’s head, “Why so serious?” We would highly encourage you as an exercise in learning about the self to see the humor of life’s situations, to realize that your incarnations here are a beautiful, fun, entertaining game. They are music—each action is a note in the sonata—they are art, they are dance. There is a great lightness, a freedom in each of your actions that once you become coiled down into your conscious experience of third density, they are often hard to see.

We would convey the image of viewing your life like a reality TV show, a funny TV show, in which you can observe yourself and instead of looking back with regret at your actions, see the humor and the entertainment it causes for the Creator, the joy that each of your actions conveys. To be able to look back and laugh at the lessons learned at how things that seem such silliness, that seem so inconsequential form together into the most breathtaking symmetry.

We are not suggesting that life be approached with lackadaisical foolishness, but that when things seem so hard on you, you feel so down on the self and you criticize yourself and the trouble seemed so heaped upon to take a moment to step back and see the humor and then see the love. This instrument is an artist and greatly enjoys expressing her creativity. We would invite you to recognize your Creator’s potential in your life; that you are creating this artwork that at any moment you may suddenly manipulate the brush strokes, the pencil marks, that your life is an ongoing painting that will not be finished until it is through but each stroke constitutes a part of this painting. To stand back and see the beauty of everything that you have created thus far. To see the picture it creates can bring comfort to one who is having difficulty accepting the self in the moment, accepting a certain action, a certain feeling. It is these perceived mistakes that have brought you to where you are today. It is these notes that make the song, these steps that make the dance. While no two songs or dances or pieces of art are the same. It would be incredibly boring if everyone painted the same picture.

Your little faults and your shortcomings are what makes you, you. And to recognize the beauty of this and the I of complex symmetry that can result from what seems like utter chaos. This can help the soul in finding the love for the self and that love seems very hard to find. This instrument also takes great joy in visualization—she easily forms pictures in her head. She herself has found it very useful in the past experiences to visualize the self, to have a running conversation with the self. Your being is not static, you are not a solid, heavy object confined to a certain state. You are moving energy and this can easily be projected and woven. To have a good conversation with the self, to sit down like old friends over tea, to clear the air, to be a psychologist for yourself, these, at the very least, this instrument has found helpful.

You do not have to distance yourself from yourself and see yourself as this entity to be observed and studied and judged, but to see the self as an old friend; that friend you would do anything for, which you would get up at 5:00 in the morning to go help. If you find that you have a great ability to forgive others but not yourself, try to look at yourself as one of those other selves because all of those other selves are you. Give yourself a hug. Shake your hand. Tell yourself it’s going to be okay. You’re not in it alone—even in the sense of the established entity of the self that you recognize in third density.

We would also say to you that you are not alone, also in the sense that there are many, many guides and beings who will gladly help you, both incarnate and discarnate, if you but ask. There are healers, therapists incarnate among you right now and there are guides and angels and light being who will gladly help you in aligning your chakras and allow that love to [blow] through you [strongly], to wrap that blanket of love around you when it feels so cold. All that needs to be done is to accept this help, to ask for it. There is much perception that this is a battle that must be fought alone, that you have to battle it out with the self with sword and shield and somehow conquer the self into this form that is acceptable to you, but to see it as more of a gathering of people from without and within, a little powwow of love. You are not alone when it comes to these matters.

Lastly, we would say that when observing the self a certain level of humility is required when it comes to forgiving yourself. If you look at those who walk the path of service to self, you’ll see a great deal of pride, of elevating the self above others, and yet all issues of love with the self are simply discarded with this pride. It’s a slipcover for the feelings within to recognize that in order to truly know and face and forgive the self you must become vulnerable; you must remove all these outer layers of pride and the defense mechanisms you’ve set up in order to make yourself acceptable to both self and others. Simply stare at the self, face to face, and realize that you are no better or no worse then any other speck of life in the universe. See through the eyes of yourself.

We find that this instrument’s energy is becoming depleted and would therefore pass this connection to the one known as Jim. We are those of the Q’uo.

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and am with this instrument. We greet each again in love and in light. Thus we have recommended to you, my friends, that one of the basic means by which we may begin to love and accept and forgive the self for perceived failures is to have the light touch when looking at one’s own experience. The light touch will allow you to perceive a wider view, shall we say, of the self, including qualities that may be missed when one takes the self overly seriously. We see you have not just the behaviors and ways of looking at yourself given to you, you may say, before the incarnation begins by your own preincarnative choices, but you have certain experiences that are planned that will provide you with the opportunity to see yourself in a certain way. For example, it is quite often the practice of those older souls, we may call them, who wish to increase their quality of compassion in an overall sense or a general sense, to program into the upcoming incarnation a seeming lack of this compassion for the self—not for other selves, for that would be inappropriate, but to use the self as the laboratory, so that as one goes through the daily round of experience, time after time after time, certain patterns are seen.

The mask between the consciousness of conscious self begins to be removed. You become aware of certain repeating themes, life motifs, qualities, experiences, that are of yourself and which you have a response to in a certain way that would equal a lack of compassion for the self. If you take time on a regular basis, perhaps daily, to review your day’s experiences, and see how these repetitive patterns are experienced it is helpful to allow them and your response to them to become large, shall we say, in your consciousness, to enhance them even, so that you intensify the experience and your feeling for lack of compassion for yourself that comes from it.

Then, as you are aware of this intensity of experience, the lack of compassion of self for self, and to allow a balancing feeling, that is, of love for self, to become a moving portion of your being, to become a balance of this lack of compassion. To feel, indeed, the compassion for the self that keeps repeating this pattern, that keeps feeling distrust, dislike, anger at self, or repeating this pattern. To feel compassion for the self that is so hard on itself. Allow both the lack of compassion and the compassion to exist within your being, equal now in intensity. Accept yourself for having both, for are you not the one Creator who has within Itself all things, all emotions, all feelings?

This is a process by which you may become aware of how you are gaining the quality of compassion, the fulfilling of a preincarnative choice that is common to almost all seekers of truth, for as one seeks these basic qualities of love and wisdom and the balance of love and wisdom which is the power to serve the one Creator more effectively it is often the case that a seeming lack of these qualities will exist within the being and there will be a confusion within the being for as long as these qualities exist in an unbalanced fashion. You balance them by your attention daily or as nearly so as possible, so that you begin to see the process of evolution of your spirit, of your soul, being in your daily round of activities.

We would, at this time, transfer this contact to the one known as Carla. We are those of Q’uo.

(Carla channeling)

We are those of the principle of Q’uo, and we are now with this instrument greeting you once again in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator.

My friends, there are things about being a human being on the third planet from the sun in your solar system in your third density at this time that are known to you. Your situation is familiar. You are indeed a creator, but you are a very young creator. You have the tune but not the words of love. There are gaps that surprise you and this you know and you are aware of the glory of being a human being in third density on the third planet from the sun, for as seemingly imperfect as you are, you have the capacity to move through the gateway of intelligent infinity and to bring back the infinite that it may radiate through your being, light you like a lighthouse and shine for all to see. The animals, the plants, the air, the water, all of the qualities of first and second density that surround you have this capacity as well, but they have no awareness of it; they are the dance, they are love, they move to help, support, without thought, without intention.

Each of you, my friends, is capable of setting an intention to serve on purpose, and if you serve in a way you consider imperfectly, so be it.

Why is it so important to love the self? The one known as J who asked this question touched upon that facet himself, intuiting his way to his own answer. Before you love another, you must fall in love with yourself. This instrument is very fond of an old song, “My funny valentine, sweet comic valentine, you make me smile with my heart. Your looks are laughable, unphotographable, but you’re my favorite work of art.” You need to become your favorite work of art. You need to fall in love with yourselves as wonderful and foolish and silly and evil-minded and mean and every other quality that you know of. And you need to bring all of those dark and light qualities into your heart, not to judge, but to love. For as you come to know yourself more and more, you will find the truth running deep and true under the folly of personality and opinion and that truth is that you carry the Creator’s consciousness within you and by using your will and setting your intention you may be a place where light dwells and oh, what a saving grace it is to others when they see you shine, unconcerned that you are imperfect, knowing that whatever you are, you are the Creator.

It is important to love the self because it is as you love yourself that you are capable of loving others. The next time that you wish judgment upon yourself for any reason, take a moment to look into the mirror and look into your eyes, not at your eyes or your image, but into that black portion of the eye which accepts the light and creates the image, look into your eyes and see the Creator and fall in love with the opportunity that is you. Your possibilities are endless. There is no need for judgment. There is every need for support, encouragement, understanding and compassion. You did not come into this world to be perfect or perfect yourself, for you see, my friends, it is not about you. It is not about the personality. It is about the larger you, and we mean that in two ways: there is a larger you that is still you. It consists of your soul stream, it consists of that personality that you are now and it consists of other personalities that you were and will be in other experiences of incarnation.

That which you experience as this incarnation before you has a texture, a rhythm, and a rightness of its own, yet it is also that which fits into large groups of experiences of all kinds that you have gathered here and there as a child picking wildflowers in a meadow, a meadow of stars in an infinite creation, and you fit, not only within yourself but as part of your soul stream you fit perfectly. It is difficult to see this wide perspective, when the heart within you is beating a rhythm of judgment upon yourself and it is for this reason that we have suggested various ways of broadening your perspective, dollying back, as this instrument would say, from the close-up that the camera holds when you gaze at yourself in judgment.

And there is another way that you are part of a great self, and that is the fundamental way, the way of consciousness, for the consciousness that you carry within you is the consciousness of the Creator, the Logos, the one great original Thought, and that Thought is a thought that is made up entirely of love. You distort that love as it pleases you to do, yet you cannot move away from who you are, and that is love. You can play with the thought of, “Why did I come here. What is my purpose? Did I come to witness? Did I come to balance myself? Did I come to serve?” There was a call, there was a need; your heart was great and you responded. You came into this shadowland of this third planet from the sun full of love and ready to serve and this is your moment in the spotlight. You have written the script. You have set the stage. Let yourself shine and you shall serve.

We thank the one known as J for this query and would ask at this time before we leave this topic if the one known as J has a follow-up that he would like to make at this time? We are those of Q’uo.

No thank you, Q’uo.

We would at this time open this meeting to other queries. Is there another query in the group at this time? We are those of Q’uo.

Q’uo, I don’t have a question but I wanted to personally thank you for the work you’ve been doing with us. I don’t think I’ve ever done that.

We are those of Q’uo and, my sister, our hearts beat high with joy. You lift us up with your beauty and we thank you. Is there a query in this group before we take our leave? We are those of Q’uo.


We are those of Q’uo, and are again with this instrument. From the resounding silence in the group we find that we have exhausted the queries that have any wish to be vocalized this evening and so we find that our time here has drawn to an end. We want to thank each of you for setting aside the time in your busy lives to seek the truth. We want to thank you for coming together in such harmony and beauty and creating such a powerful light, truly [inaudible], your combined aura soars high into the heavens above your dwelling place and it is a sight to behold, indeed. Thank you for your witness to the truth and for your purity of seeking.

At this time we would leave this instrument and this group rejoicing in the one Creator. We leave you in its power and its peace, its love, and its light, and we wish you adonai. Adonai. We are known to you as the principle of Q’uo.